While Las Vegas Sleeps…

Well it’s high season for the conventions and bachelor parties, that is for sure! I do admit, though, I am more of a fan of the convention-goers than the bachelor parties. Parties are pretty predictable to the point that I could break it down into three types of guys that are almost always present at one of these gatherings. Kind of humorous, too, for sure!

1) The Cool Guy – This is the guy who thinks his ducks are all in a row by organizing the girls to come over (usually the best man, but surprisingly a lot of best men completely drop the ball) and has explained to his fellow friends that he knows how the whole thing is going down. Unfortunately he usually gives the wrong impression to the guys about what the girl on the phone said to him about how things really go for parties (like he thinks that we work for one-dollar bills and that this must be a cheaper route than the club when, in fact, it’s like an ultimate VIP room party, but on location to their hotel!)

2) The Guy Who Is Never Happy – This guy usually happens to double as being the most broke guy in the room. as well. He had 40 bucks to spend and wanted to make sure it spent like it was $1000. He also doesn’t care about the bachelor (the person who the party is actually for,) but more concerned about what he is getting for the money spent. His attitude a lot of times kills the party’s mood and brings the other guys down before they can ever get down!

3) The Crazy Guy – This is the carefree spirit of the party who doesn’t care what it takes to have fun and will do whatever he can to entertain his buddies. When asked for tips to play stripper games of stuffing the bachelor’s boxers with dollars he actually will shove the dollar bills in himself. He sometimes will feel the need to show off his dancing skills to the ladies and never forgets to ask if we need a drink… twenty times. Also, he is usually the most generous tipper of the bunch and realizes his other friends are pretty lame when it comes to having a good time.

Unfortunately the three main characters at typical bachelor parties sometimes combine themselves into the same person! Just yesterday The Cool Guy turned into the Never Happy Guy within ten minutes… That’s just never a pretty sight for a girl standing there in a g-string!

Tags: Las Vegas bachelor parties, Las Vegas stories, Las Vegas strippers

Only in Las Vegas, Nevada, would you see a man’s privates in public before dinnertime, and if you did happen to see said man’s now public privates, there’s a good chance it would be on Tropicana Boulevard.

A few weeks ago I was driving down Tropicana from the office of a service that offers “strippers to your room,” when on the opposite side of the road, I saw a man in his fifties with only sweatpants on and his shirt laying on the ground. Reluctantly standing next to this guy was a man who picks up the trash for the Wild Wild West Casino and Truck Stop who was trying to do his job of emptying out the trash barrels along the road and parking lot of the property. He couldn’t do his job very well, though, since the half naked man was yelling at him, pushing him, and then suddenly trying to hug him, as if to say, “I’m sorry. That was wrong of me.” He’d go through this process, over and over – yelling, pushing, then apologizing.

The craziness with the casino janitor was interrupted, though, when the half-naked man suddenly decided to walk away from the worker, stop traffic on Tropicana, and yell at a car before returning to the sidewalk. After getting out of the road, he proceeded to pull down his sweatpants and reveal his shriveled privates to all who were watching.

The best timing by a cop I have ever witnessed was when a Metro officer pulled up on the curb just as this nut pulled his pants down. The now naked man had the most shocked look on his face when he realized he was caught red handed with his pants down. Literally. Mind you… This was all before 2:30pm on a chilly day. I would have kept my pants on even if I were inside… I’ll reserve my stripping for warm hotel rooms!

Tags: homeless, Las Vegas, Nevada, Sin City, Stories, strippers, Tropicana

Being a stripper here in Las Vegas always has its perks, for sure. Sure, you make decent money while dancing for parties and what-have-you, but there are the other over-looked perks, too, such as becoming an expert previewer of every high-end hotel suite in Las Vegas! When you think about it, out-call strippers or escorts get more “hands-on” experience at more hotel rooms than anyone else in town! *drum hit*

Last Saturday night was one good example of that… A good friend of mine gave me a heads up on a bachelor party who was asking for some girls to come by and dance at their room at the Palms Hotel. I got a second girl lined up to go with me and we made our way over to the Palms around 2am. The new Fantasy Tower there has its fair share of awesome, custom designed suites, for sure. The sky lofts (including the Playboy Suite you might have seen in their ads) have small pools on the east end of the building, outside, over-looking the Las Vegas Strip. There’s the Hard Court Suite with a basketball court included in your room (they will even supply cheerleaders but they are an extra charge), there’s another one with a small bowling alley (and downstairs from it - whatever room that is - is notorious for having pissed off guests that end up being comped hotel guests,) and the one I got to check out Saturday night was the Celebrity Suite. It’s every bachelor party’s dream come true. Behind the nicely-designed wet bar is a huge window that looks into a large room with shower-heads all around it, featuring a stripper pole in the center of the shower area! This is bachelor party genius, I’m telling you. …And of course, don’t forget the colorful dance club lighting and music piped in there to complete the whole effect, as well.

The girl I chose to come along with me helped figure out what kind of bachelor party we were going to give for the tips they provided at the beginning of the show (we always like to see what people’s budgets are so we can give the best show for the price instead of being tipped along the way and constantly counting money - that sort of ruins the vibe for them and it’s usually less bang for their buck, so to speak.) After deciding what our plan of attack would be, I started dancing around the room for every member of the party (especially the bachelor, naturally) while my friend stripped naked and put on a show on the pole in the shower room for the guys waiting for their dance. Pretty awesome… Who ever came up with the idea for a stripper pole shower room should be given some sort of award!!

Editor’s Note: I’m pretty sure this concept was invented by my good friend and lap dance pioneer - Steve Braudway - back in 1993. He’s probably still anxiously waiting for his royalty checks to start coming in…

Tags: bachelor parties, bachelor party, casino, debauchery, Entertainment, escorts, Las Vegas strippers, Palms Hotel, Stories, story, strippers, tipping, tips, VIP service