Las Vegas Entertainment Blogs

Real Stories of the Most Unreal City on Earth… A Real Las Vegas Blog.

Guest Column: Nick the Cabbie – “Another Taxi Moment”

Guest Columnists, Las Vegas, Nick the Cabbie, Sin City, Stories, Taxicab Confessions, Vices
Posted December 10th, 2008 by Nick the Cabbie - 2 comments

There’s some guy waving frantically at all the cabs driving in front of the Gold Coast. It must be some sort of emergency. Despite the urgency of his flailing, I’m almost past him by the time I notice and I have no doubt that one of the other cabs will pick him up before I can turn around. The light takes forever and when he comes back into view I start to think that maybe there is some reason that none of the other drivers want to pick him up. I raise my heightened alert status even further when he does some kind of crazy taxi victory dance, but then I see the rest of his group and scale it back down. I know that sometimes one cute girl will hang out with a complete wack-job, but I’m hoping that when they travel in packs their tolerance for insanity in men goes way down.

I’m greeted with an enthusiasm that is usually reserved for rescue workers. You would think that I found them drifting out at sea or buried under tons of rubble. I decide not to mention the line of cabs they would have encountered if they had only chosen a different exit. I like being a hero. Saving people feels nice. He thanks me again as the three cute girls get in the back seat. The first girl asks my name and then she thanks me as well. That’s when my hero-code kicks in and I explain that Vegas and New York operate completely differently when you want to find a taxi. In New York you have to flag them down. In Vegas they’re almost always lined up somewhere close to wherever you happen to be.

I punch it through a yellow light and the girl cheers me on: “Go, Nick, go!” If you know me at all you might not believe this, but Speed Racer doesn’t even cross my mind. The second “Go, Nick, go!” also fails to trigger any Mach Five-related reference in my brain. It’s almost like I’m not me. The guy is friendly and charismatic and could probably become a movie star with very little effort and almost no acting ability. I learn that they are all in town for a cheerleading competition and he seems kind of embarrassed about being a cheerleading coach. I can’t think of a single reason that makes that less than completely awesome though, and I say, “my roommate would probably love to go watch you guys” (insert editor’s note about which roommate here) [Editor's Note: he means Elizabeth, I'm sure, but he could have just as easily meant me.] …while still thinking about a job that requires constant cheerleader access.

The girl in the back says, “Nick is chill,” and I begin to suspect that she’s been drinking. This fact is confirmed after a couple more of her observations. There’s a level of intoxication that only certain people seem to reach and it gives them an almost metaphysical sense of things. I encounter these people so very rarely, but out of all the different types of drunkies, they are my favorite. “You live here, so you’re like, VIP, right?” she asks me. I think to myself, “Hah… yeah, right,” and laugh a little. She says, “Oh, he’s laughing… that means ‘yes.’ He’s thinking, ‘Hell yeah, I’m VIP. …Everywhere I go.’” I’m sure she completely believes this to be true and, on some level, it is, so I refrain from comment. She cheers again when their hotel slides into view: “Go, Nick, go!” and I wonder why I don’t have more friends with this style of fun.

The other two girls are suspiciously silent. Tired? Already asleep? Too drunk for words? It’s impossible to tell. Perhaps I imagined them. I find out that the chatty girl is the second cheerleading coach and that both coaches are also medical students before finally dropping them at their destination. For all I know she and the movie star are together (they’d make a great couple), but that doesn’t quell the intense desire I have to interact with her at some later time. [ Editor's Note: When Nick says "interact" he means "debauch," I'm pretty sure. I know I would, at least. ] I have no idea what to say to make that happen though, so I say nothing. Then, as she walks around the front of the car I realize that she’s not just cute, she’s the most beautiful girl that has ever been in my cab …and I don’t even know her name.

This story doesn’t really have the happiest ending, but I learned one thing that I probably should have already known, and now I can share it with you: some moments seem more fleeting than others …and sometimes a moment is all you get.

[ Editor's Note: This is a horribly sad story. Poor Nick! ]

Tags: , , , , , , , , , , ,

2 Comments

  1. Las Vegas USA on December 12, 2008 :

    Yeah in NY you have to jump out in the road and throw you arms in the air. You really end up look silly but at least someone stops.

  2. Tony Sena on January 10, 2009 :

    I would have to imagine that cabbie drives have some of the greatest stories as they come across interesting characters every day.

Leave a Reply

Categories